Bullying prevention programs boost resilience, intervention Published March 9, 2011 By Paula Tracy 81st Medical Operations Squadron family advocacy outreach manager KEESLER AIR FORCE BASE, Miss. -- Think about the word "bully," and what image comes to mind? Many people imagine a loner -- a tough talking, menacing playground nemesis that lies in wait to knock down and steal the lunch of the unfortunate classmate. On the contrary, research indicates that most bullies are not socially isolated; they have an easier time making friends than children who don't bully others. Bullies often have at least a small group of friends who support and encourage their bullying behavior. Another myth about bullies is that they possess low self-esteem. In fact, they typically have average or above average self-esteem. And girls bully, too -- while boys tend to be more overt, girls may use rumors, gossip and teasing to gain power and social control. While certainly not new, bullying has become increasingly aggressive and widespread in the 21st century. And when it occurs in the lower grades it carries disastrous long-term outcomes. Victims tend to become anxious, insecure, overly cautious and suffer from low self-esteem. They may lack social skills and, in an attempt to end the bullying, self-isolate. Bullying is negatively linked to child development, relationship formation and psychological well-being. Bullies learn that anti-social behavior and exerting control over others is acceptable and that it works. Bullying creates an atmosphere that is toxic for everyone. Because of this, many schools now promote bullying prevention programs for students and train staff in detection and intervention. Parents need to be educated too, so that they are in touch with what their kids actually face every day. Parents can model and reinforce resiliency by being consistently supportive and available in the life of their children. For the past six weeks, the Family Advocacy Program has teamed up with the Youth Center to discuss situations and skills to increase empathy and boost resistance to being bullied. Using songs, interactive exercises, computer videos and role-play, Youth center kids ranging from 5 to 12 have participated in the after-school program. Social work intern Megan Gajewski and outreach manager Paula Tracy collaborated on the program, tailoring it to the ages and interests of the kids. "I was amazed at the ideas and insight the children already have," stated Ms. Gajewski. "They really thought about the content and brought their own experiences to the discussion. It was great working with them." Parents wanting to learn more about how they can help their kids become bully-resistant are in luck. Excellent resources for kids are available, including "The Berenstain Bears and the Bully" (Stan & Jan Berenstain, 1993), "Bully on the Bus" (Carl Bosch, 1988), "Bullies are a Pain in the Brain" (video/ Trevor Romain, 1998), and "What's Wrong With Timmy?" (Maria Shriver, 2001). Parents can visit www.bullybeware.com or www.cfchildren.org for a wealth of information or call family advocacy, 376-3457.